Working in an office in Japan – Part 2

Based on my experiences working here, I’ve realized that many Japanese in the office don’t just say “No” to you or say “You’re doing a terrible job.” They like to indirectly hint at the idea of these, instead, using carefully worded phrases. For your consideration, I have translated them below into more plain-spoken English.

NOTE: Please keep in mind, this is just from my experience. I in no way aim to say that this applies to every single office environment here. This is only what I have learned from my own experiences.

Saying no

“That would be a little difficult to do.”
That’s never going to happen.
“Let me think about it.”
And the answer is no.
“We’ve never done that before.”
And we don’t plan to start now.
“That’s an interesting idea.”
That’s a weird idea I don’t like.
Dear God it’s such a hard pass that I couldn’t even find a way around being indirect.
“I’m sorry but…”
…this is not going to happen.

Saying you did a bad job at something

“That was hard to do, wasn’t it?”
You did an absolutely horrible job.
“You worked hard.”
A for effort.
“Would you like my help?”
I can’t stand to see you do such a horrible job anymore.
“You’re so good at this.”
I’m trying to build up your confidence.
“It’s an interesting take on it.”
This is completely wrong.
“It’s a little different than how I imagined it would be.”
Did you even listen to me when I gave you the directions on how to do this?

Hopefully this helpful new pocket translation dictionary I just wrote up will help you out if you ever decide to work in a traditional Japanese office setting so you don’t waltz around the office oblivious to the undertones of what people are saying to you.

Working in an office in Japan – Part 1

I’ve lived in Japan for over 12 years, and all of that has been spent working. As such, I thought I’d spend the next few posts talking about what it’s like working here.

NOTE: Please keep in mind, this is just from my experience. I in no way aim to say that this applies to every single office environment here. This is only what I have learned from my own experiences.

The Golden Rule

If you learn nothing else, learn this: Just because your work is done for the day does not, by any means, mean you get to leave early. If you get your work done by 2 p.m. and stand up, announce “I’ve finished my work for today so good-bye to you all,” you will swiftly become the most hated person in the office.

Even leaving on time is usually a sign you’re just not dedicated enough to your work. I usually flagrantly ignore the pointed stares of people and leave on time, though, because I have a family to get home to.

What you’re supposed to do, however, is if you somehow manage to finish all of your work, you must then ask co-workers if you can help them with their work. Your mission is to not go home until at least the head of your department goes home.

Japan still seems to adore people who overwork, even though so many people here literally die from working too much. I think it’s a toxic mentality that really needs to change.

The hierarchy

Personally, I think Japan wasn’t ready to say good-bye to feudal lords. Much like some dinosaurs evolving into birds, feudal lords and samurai simply evolved into office workers.

Sitting at the top of this feudal system is the president of the company. This man (unfortunately usually a man – Japan has a long way to go) is usually so revered in the company that I get the feeling I shouldn’t even look them in the eye if I were to ever meet them.

The hierarchy is filtered down through the various departments.

Within a department you usually have:

  1. The head of the department (bucho)
  2. The second-in-command (fuku-bucho)
  3. A few other people who are like supervisors
  4. People who have been there a while
  5. People who have been there kind of a while
  6. People who are part-time or dispatch
  7. People who just started out

The people who have been there longer than you are called your sempai (superiors) while you are their kouhai (subordinate). While your job is to listen to what your sempais tell you to do, their job is to nurture you and make you a better employee. Of course, this isn’t how it always pans out. Lots of sempai enjoy reenacting The Devil Wears Prada on their kouhai. Lots of kouhai expect their sempai to take responsibility for everything. It happens, and it can be miserable.

Many kouhai put up with getting ordered around a lot because they are holding onto the dream that new hires will arrive the next fiscal year (new hires usually come into a department at the beginning of April). Then, the once-kouhai employees will have someone to whom they will be known as a sempai. The people who have worked there longer, naturally, will forever be your sempai. I haven’t seen much meritocracy in action in the offices here.

Something I find both amusing and frustrating is that a lot of employees nearing retirement are basically allowed to do whatever they want at the office. I’ve seen people just sit in the back of the office and take a daily nap whenever the mood strikes. I think the other employees just allow this, even the head of the department, because that employee probably sweated blood and tears for the past 50 years.

Office shuffle

Something both odd and intriguing that I’ve noticed here is that most companies have various departments within their office, and will shuffle people through the various departments throughout that person’s career there. This means I’ve had bosses who are there for three years before being moved to another department. Co-workers come and go as well. Only the one-year contract people, dispatch workers and part-timers stick around in one department for a little while.

I think this shuffle is odd in that I believe it makes sense to create a team of experts in any given department to ensure work is being done well. I also think it’s intriguing because it can get quite boring doing the same work day in and day out, so moving to a different department every few years makes work a little bit less boring.

Dealing with conflict

I have noticed that direct confrontation here is usually avoided at all cost in the office. If you’re going to start yelling at someone, you had better either be their boss or severely drunk at the time and near a pub.

If you have an issue with one of your co-workers, the common course of action is actually not to just walk up to them and say, “Hey, I’d love to talk to you about this problem I have with something you did.” Instead, you are generally encouraged to take it directly to either the head of the department (bucho) or the second-in-command in the department (fuku-bucho). That person then either expresses that complaint to the offending person or tells you it’s not worth pursuing.

As such, you might never know if people in the office have a problem with you until the head of the department saunters over to your desk to discuss it with you.

That is not to say gossip and commiserating with your co-workers about other co-workers isn’t rampant. I’ve found many co-workers will be absolutely civil to people who have offended them in the office, only to rant about them for the full hour-long lunch break.

All of this to say that just because no one says anything to you about something doesn’t mean they’re all just fine with it. For example, the dress code says no heavy perfume, but you decide to wear it and think it’s ok because no one is saying anything. On the contrary, everyone in the office is waiting for someone else to be brave enough to talk to the head of the department about you.

This all raises the question of: But what if your head of the department is horrible?

Most people in the offices where I have worked just suck it up when their boss is a nightmare.

The vaccine

After much waiting and sheer paranoia just going outside to buy groceries, I finally got the second dose of the vaccine.

Since I heard about the vaccine back at the beginning of the year (I think it was around then – everything has kind of melded together at this point), I couldn’t wait to get it.

It’s an odd feeling welcoming a horribly sore arm for the first dose and then merrily skipping to the second dose so I can feel like I’ve been in a badly planned bar fight the day after. But here we are.

As I wrote earlier, Japan gave every eligible person living in Japan a vaccination certificate in July good for two doses of a vaccine for free. They had a few websites set up for making appointments and a chart that let you know whether your surrounding clinics were interested in you calling them up, checking their website, going through the city’s vaccination website or some combination of them.

The problem was that everything booked up in an instant. This was right before the Olympics kicked off, and I think everyone was thinking like me in that it would probably be a good idea to be vaccinated before they began.

I at least got a stroke of luck in that I saw on the little chart mailed to me along with the vaccine certificates that my local clinic was fine with me calling them to ask. So I called them just before they closed for lunch, and they had exactly one appointment available. I didn’t care when; I took it. You want me at the clinic at 3 a.m. on a Monday morning? I’m there. I was beyond desperate for the vaccine.

I think driving my panic is obviously the delta variant, and the fact that about 95% of Japanese people, based on my own observations, are wearing masks out in public. This is a culture that has long accepted masks for occasions ranging from “I’m really sick” to “I didn’t have time to put makeup on this morning.” This is a culture that has now put wearing masks in public on the same level as wearing clothing in public.

And yet, the delta variant is raging here. I think people are getting tired of wearing masks to this extent, even in this country of mask-wearers. Society is pressing on with schools being back in session and people expected to head on in to work on crowded trains. People are starting to think taking their masks off for a few hours at a pub won’t be a huge problem.

To me, that means masks alone aren’t going to cut it anymore. Since the beginning of this pandemic I have held on to the belief that not making unnecessary outings, wearing a mask and washing my hands would all help me not catch this virus. Now I’m seeing that it’s all not enough.

And so here I am, gratefully suffering side-effects from my second dose of the vaccine, a great weight of anxiety raised slightly off my shoulders. I know there are breakthrough cases, but it’s only a fool who thinks anything is bulletproof. I’m sure I’ll wind up with horrible luck and get the stupid virus anyway. I’m just praying that I can help push along herd immunity all the same.

A newspaper the other day said about 50% of all those eligible for the vaccine in Japan have now gotten their second dose. I am praying, deeply horribly praying, that the percentage only rises.